Yesterday, as I looked in my sons room and saw his coat hanging from a chair, dirty clothes on the floor, half empty chip bags on his table, and a piece of an uneaten oatmeal creme pie in his toy box....I amazingly stayed calm! A few months ago I would have flipped out on him. He was in the bath tub and asked me to bring some toys. When I took the toys in the bathroom, I politely mentioned the oatmeal creme pie in the toy box, the chips etc. and requested that he clean up after putting on his PJs. He completely ignored my request......
Then I thought back to when I was a child. I remember the nights my dad said he wanted me to wash the dishes. I would say OK then politely get up, go to my room and get in the bed! Only one morning at 4A did my dad ever wake me up to do it. I also think back to when I was about my sons age, I would put clean clothes in the dirty clothes hamper because I didn't want to put them away. Oh my, when my mother figured it out she was pissed but her solution was I had to wash my own clothes. I've been washing my clothes since I was 9 years old.
As I laid in bed last night I began thinking and reflecting. Heck at my age I don't always want to hang up my coat, or put my things away immediately, I know better, sometimes I do it regularly and consistently, sometimes I don't and that's OK. So why in the world would I expect my 7 year old to be so consistent with the responsibility?
The Bible says to train a child up....I'm and I'm sure the parents reading this are doing just that, training their children and instilling values about health, hygeine, eating habits, cleanliness etc. but at the same time we have to let them be kids and find their own way. If my son behaved like an adult and did everything he was supposed to do and right, he wouldn't need a parent. Now don't get me wrong there are the children that do all of these things and that is awesome if they do BUT the majority of us, if we think back to our own childhoods we heard our parents but we didn't listen ALL the time. However, now that we are older we do what we know what we are supposed to do because we are mature. Well at least I hope so.
Someone tweeted this verse yesterday and I had another aha moment. 1 Corinthians 13:11 "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I
reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put childish ways behind
me." Again kids will be kids. As parents our responsibility is to train them, lead them, provide wisdom and guidance yet we also must be UNDERSTANDING. Our children will make mistakes that they will hopefully learn valuable lessons from. It would be great if they don't make the same mistakes we did as I read "a wise man learns from others mistakes while a fool learns from his own." Nevertheless they will make mistakes, hopefully nothing to detrimental or damaging. At best we can expose our children to wisdom, give them the tools and keep the faith that they use them. The Bible also says, when they get older they shall not part from it. I like the way Creflo Dollar said, that doesn't mean there won't be some mess in between childhood and adulthood BUT what is instilled will eventually be applied. We cannot control our childrens lives, make decisions for them, and constantly have an I told you so attitude, as much as a lot of parents want to!!!!
The Most High doesn't do us that way and our Creator knows that we know better. We have to trust that we've given our children all they need to be successful adults. My age of letting go is going to be 21, letting go in the sense that I've raised my children and now I'm a listening ear providing guidance and wisdom still but as a counselor not a warden.
Best believe he will be cleaning his room up when he comes home from school today though!!!!!!!!
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